Kimiko Kitamura: Single Mother in Japan, beauty pageant finalist, and cultural navigator. Reference Videos: https://youtu.be/v8ax6Kjisc4 Introduction A finalist in Tokyo’s unique beauty contest, Today’s Woman, Kimiko is not just a competitor but a single mom raising two daughters while navigating cultural and personal challenges. From her reflections on Japanese traditions to her thoughts on raising biracial children in Japan, Kimiko’s story is filled with strength, humor, and heartfelt wisdom. Life as a Single Mom in Japan Leo (Japan Documented):Kimiko, thank you for joining us. Can you tell us a little about your background? Kimiko Kitamura:Thank you for having me! I’m from Hakodate, Hokkaido, but I’ve been living in Kanagawa and Tokyo for about ten years now. Leo:You’re raising two daughters as a single mom. How has that experience been for you? Kimiko:It’s a mix of challenges and blessings. My parents and grandmother, who raised me, have all passed away, so I’m raising my daughters pretty much on my own. Luckily, I have amazing friends who I call my family. They support us, whether it’s watching the kids or simply being there to guide them. Leo:What has been the hardest part? Kimiko:One of the toughest things is the lack of a consistent child support system in Japan. Parents can choose to avoid their responsibilities, and enforcing payments is nearly impossible. I haven’t received any support for three years now. It’s not about the money – it’s about showing children that both parents are there for them. Leo:That sounds tough. Did becoming a single mom change how you view yourself? Kimiko:It did. For a long time, I felt like I failed as a wife and as a woman. My grandmother’s words haunted me—she said that once you choose a partner, you must stay with them until the end. When my marriage ended, I felt like I wasn’t good enough. But over time, I’ve come to see my worth differently. Competing in Today’s Woman Leo:You’ve competed in Today’s Woman, a beauty contest celebrating plus-sized women. How did you get involved? Kimiko:I started three years ago, and I’ve been lucky enough to make the Top 10 twice. It’s not just about beauty – it’s about sharing your story and inspiring others. (she won the prize at Today’s Woman 2024) Leo:What was the most memorable moment in the competition? Kimiko:The Q&A segment last year stands out. A judge asked me about my “power food” and motivation. I said, “My power food is white rice—sticky and tasty. And my motivation is my kids.” It was simple, but it came straight from the heart. Leo:How has the competition changed you? Kimiko:It’s given me confidence. I’ve learned to embrace who I am, imperfections and all. It’s also shown my daughters that it’s okay to stand out and be proud of yourself. Japanese Culture and Identity Leo:You’ve lived in Japan your whole life. What do you love most about Japanese culture? Kimiko:I love the concept of tatemae, where people show a polite, surface-level attitude before getting to deeper feelings. It creates a sense of comfort in initial interactions. Leo:Is there anything you find strange about Japanese culture? Kimiko:(Laughs) Definitely! For example, we bow while talking on the phone, even though no one can see us. My daughters often tease me about my high-pitched “phone voice.” Leo:You’ve also experienced cultural differences through your marriage to an American. What stood out to you the most? Kimiko:Confidence. Americans are so good at expressing themselves, whether it’s complimenting a stranger on the street or taking pride in their achievements. It’s something I admire and try to teach my daughters. Leo:Speaking of your daughters, what’s it like raising biracial children in Japan? Kimiko:It has its challenges. People often stare or point, saying things like “hafu kawaii” (half-Japanese and cute). While it’s meant as a compliment, it can feel intrusive. I worry about my girls growing up thinking they’re always the center of attention. Leo:How do you teach them to stay grounded? Kimiko:I remind them that while they’re special to me, they’re not inherently more special than anyone else. It’s important to treat everyone with kindness and respect. Looking Ahead Leo:What motivates you to keep going despite the challenges? Kimiko:My daughters. They surprise me in the best ways, like on Mother’s Day when they gave me a tiny preserved rose they saved up for. It’s moments like these that make everything worthwhile. Leo:What’s your favorite place to visit in Japan? Kimiko:Okinawa. The people are so relaxed and easygoing. I once attended a barbecue party on someone’s balcony with loud music playing all night! It was a stark contrast to Tokyo, where something like that would definitely get the police involved. Leo:Finally, how do you feel about your journey so far? Kimiko:I feel blessed. Life hasn’t been easy, but I’ve survived thanks to the support of friends, neighbors, and my own determination. I’m grateful for every challenge and every triumph—it’s all part of who I am. ConclusionKimiko Kitamura’s story is a testament to resilience, self-discovery, and cultural navigation. From raising her daughters as a single mom to embracing her identity through Today’s Woman, she continues to inspire those around her with her courage and warmth.